Dec 292011

The Internet has done great things for the country. We can send messages anywhere in the world quickly and for free. Pictures of cats doing funny things can now be shared with dizzying speed, and best of all, trash talk among martial arts can reach epic levels.

To illustrate, I have assembled a pie chart for your examination.

Martial arts online

This is based on information I made up on the spot which I have acquired from years of making things up. However, since this was plugged into a pie chart, I insist is stands as undeniable proof misuse of Internet resources by the martial arts. Naturally, this blog belongs in that 4% you see there in red.

Why do I say that martial arts are misusing their bandwidth? It comes down to a joke I heard the other day.

Dude 1: How many martial artists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Dude 2: I don’t know, how many?

Dude 1: One hundred. One to screw in the light bulb and ninety nine to watch and complain about how under qualified he is.

Dude 2: I don’t get it.

But I did. 86% of the Internet martial arts resources are devoted to talking about how much the martial artists love their own martial art and how bad they thinkĀ all other martial arts are, and how stupid their followers are. Now I see nothing wrong with this. It is a time honored tradition of martial arts to talk trash about each other, but it used to be confined to the dojo and it used to be couched in flowery respectful language.

Instructor: I visited (fill in the blank martial arts school) today.

Student: How was it.

Instructor: Their teacher was very respectful.

Student: Thats good. How was the class.

Instructor: You know that I have always said to be respectful of other styles, so I don’t want to be disrespectful to theirs, but I could have totally killed everyone there with my eight fingered wing chop of death.

Now you don’t have to go to class. In fact, you don’t even have to attend class. I get the feeling that most of these young trash talkers have never been to a class! Listen young whippersnappers, the forms must be observed! Talk trash the way its supposed to be done, with back biting and double talk, none of this flaming and TYPING IN CAPS! And no, I don’t care how long you have “Trained UFC on youtube” and “Wrestling my little brother” doesn’t count either, you

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